Have you heard of imposter syndrome? It’s a pattern in which someone doubts their successes and accomplishments and has a consistent internal fear of being exposed as a “fraud”. They don’t believe they deserve what they’ve achieved, and they worry about being “found out”. Can you relate?
I’ve definitely experienced imposter syndrome since quitting my job to pursue my entrepreneurial goals. Between comparing myself to others, and feeling inadequate overall, there are times I’ve felt like a total fraud. I’ve caught myself thinking things like: “I’m not an expert in this!” “Who do I really think I am to be doing this full-time?” and “They’re all going to find out I don’t have what it takes.”
I’ve talked about negative self talk in the past, but imposter syndrome is a bit different. The worry about others “finding out we’re a fraud” can be paralyzing, and can cause us to doubt ourselves in a whole new way. It can stop us from being as bold, from shining as bright, and from staying the course with our dreams.
So what gives? How can we take ownership of our success and tap into our most confident selves?
(Not sure if you have imposter syndrome? Take the quiz below!)
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Here are 6 ways to begin overcoming imposter syndrome.
#1. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others.
Okay, okay – I know that this one is easier said than done. Comparison can feel ingrained in our minds, and it can be hard to break the cycle.
But as I wrote about in my post How to Stop Comparing Ourselves to Others, there are steps we can take to do just that. Here are some of them.
Reduce the clutter.
As I mention in my post How to Use Social Media the Right Way, most of us can benefit from unfollowing accounts that make us feel bad about ourselves. This includes people you know, people you don’t know, celebrities, companies, and brands. And it includes accounts you may have found inspiring in the past.
You’ll be surprised at how much more positive and uplifting your social media browsing will be.
Recognize that you’re only seeing the highlights.
One of the most powerful realizations I’ve had is that people only really put out a highlight reel of their lives, especially on social media. And when you think about it, most of us do the same thing too.
Yet still, we tend to compare our normal to someone else’s best. In other words, we compare our view of ourselves with someone’s curated feed. We’re comparing ourselves to something that isn’t even the full picture.
Once you realize that, it becomes a bit easier to reconcile our daily lives with the highlights that surround us.
Get off social media.
Do you ever find that the days of comparison spirals coincide with more time spent on social media? I definitely do. It seems like the more time I spend on my phone, the unhappier I am.
Instead, put your phone down! Read a book, spend some time outside, connect with your partner, friends, or family. Break the cycle and take charge of what type of energy you’re consuming and creating.
Boost your own self esteem.
Arguably the best way to deal with comparing ourselves to others is to boost our perception of ourselves. By improving our self esteem, we’re less likely to fall into the trap of letting others’ perceived success make us feel bad.
For some solid ideas on how to do this, check out my post 5 Confidence Building Activities You Need to Try Today. In it, I share scientifically-proven tips to boost your confidence fast straight from my book, The Confidence Toolkit. Grab the first chapter for free today when you sign up below.
You’ll get access to my Free Resource Library under the Personal Growth and Development section.
#2. Reflect on Your Success.
Along the same lines of boosting self esteem, we can benefit from reflecting on our achievements. What have been your greatest accomplishments or successes? List them, journal about them, or day dream about them.
Spend some time reflecting on these incredible wins and what they say about you. What did you demonstrate in order to achieve them? What talents and exceptional qualities do they embody?
This exercise is powerful in that it gives you concrete evidence of what you’ve done and your track record of success.
#3. Keep a “Happy Emails”-Type Folder.
As I mentioned in my post Pop the Bubbly! How to Celebrate Your Successes, I love filing away good vibes. I actually have a “Happy Emails” folder in my email where I file any success-related emails or notes of thanks. What’s great about this is that it acts as a reference for the future. If you’re having a bad day or experiencing self-doubt, you can open that journal or folder and reflect on some of the wins you’ve had.
(And you can do the same things with physical cards!)
#4. Reduce the Pedestal.
Too often, imposter syndrome comes about because we feel we need to stand on this high-up pedestal of self importance. But are you really professing to be the ultimate and only absolute expert in a particular area? And are you doing it with a sense of self importance and an air of being better-than-thou? Probably not.
By gut checking your pedestal against reality, you can see things with greater clarity.
#5. Focus on the Value You’re Offering.
Instead of getting caught up in all the ways you feel you’re lacking, reflect on what value you ARE offering your “customer”, whether that be your boss at work, clients, or audience. What value are you delivering, day in and day out? How are you making lives easier? In what ways are you helping to solve a problem, manage an issue, or improve a situation?
This will reinforce all the reasons why you’re absolutely not a fraud, and in fact, an important contributor to your world.
#6. Talk About it With Someone.
If your imposter syndrome is really bad and causing you to second guess your plans, it’s time to kick it up a notch. Talk to someone, whether it be a friend, colleague, mentor, or professional (like a life coach!)
Not only can it help to talk it out, but they may have valuable insight you hadn’t previously considered.
Do you struggle with imposter syndrome? How do you manage it? Sound off in the comments and let us know!
And don’t forget to take the quiz below!
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